[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:00:02] Speaker B: Welcome to Life and Limb, a podcast from Thrive magazine all about living well with limb loss and limb difference. I'm Jeff Thiessen, publisher of Thrive magazine and your podcast host. My guest this episode is Michael Laughlin, Canada's first and only above knee amputee, full time firefighter. How he got there is truly a remarkable story.
In his mid-20s, Mike was badly injured in a snowmobile accident, but defied the odds and returned to firefighting. Shortly after his 30th birthday, he came home to find that his girlfriend had taken her own life. A tragedy that saw his grief ultimately turn into a battle with addiction. Life tested him again in his 30s when he hit a deer on his motorcycle. And he emerged from that catastrophe with multiple injuries, including the loss of his right leg above the knee. He defied even greater odds this time to return to the Kingston Fire and Rescue Department. Again, Canada's only full time above knee amputee firefighter. And he's an author too. A book called Untapped 60 about resilience, perseverance and perspective that released just last year. Mike, welcome. How are you?
[00:01:20] Speaker A: I'm good, thank you. Thanks for having me.
[00:01:22] Speaker B: Oh, pleasure. Real pleasure to have you on. And yeah, I got a chance to read your book and he's just fascinated by it. And it's so educational too. I mean your life story is really something, but how you added in a lot of that content to help us sort of learn more and explore more in what relates to our own life. So congrats on that and let's start with the book again. Like I said, a fascinating read and I want to work backwards, sort of a reverse engineering chronologically of your life as you share it in Untapped 60. So the book clearly about adversity and turning that into growth and self discovery. And what really struck me is how honest and vulnerable you let yourself be in that book and you really didn't shy away from pain and the struggles in your life. So the name, where did that come from, why you wrote it and who did you write it for?
[00:02:22] Speaker A: So the name Untapped 60. So it's been said, it's not, it's not scientifically proven, but it's been said that when you're at your worst, so say a soldier out on the field, he's been critically wounded and you can either lay down and die or you can dig deep and find that next level to survive and save yourself. And so it's been said that when you're at that worst spot, when you think you're going to die and it's all over. You're actually only 40% spent. You've only used 40% of your human potential. They say there's 60 more percent there to dig into. And it's the people that can tap into that 60% and keep going that survive or, or, or, you know, for me, laying in the ditch, there was that moment where I was like, okay, that's it. And I, and I wanted to close my eyes and just give up and just lay down in that ditch. But I, I tapped into that 60%. And so it really hits home for me. Is that untapped 60? It's there. I know it is. I've done it. And I, I'm. My goal is to. Is to teach everyone that they can also dig into that at their worst and, and overcome anything they're, you know, know that, that they're going through.
I wrote this book with my best friend, Jarrett Robertson, and our goal is to motivate, inspire everyone and anyone to overcome what they're going through this day and age. There's so much going on with mental health, addiction, and then obviously the struggles that amputees have and, and people that get in accidents and all the, all the stuff. And so we just want to, we want to motivate and inspire and that this, we want to make it for everybody. We want to make it an easy read, but I want to, we want people to actually get something from it, not just read me, oh, yeah, that's great that. That guy moved on. We want someone to be able to read the book, say, wow, you know, that's crazy what the, you know, he's gone through. But here's some tricks and tips for you going through your life to overcome what you're going through, not just, just look at me, what I did. We want to work on other people, too. And so our whole goal is helping people. And, and, and that's what we, that's what our, you know, that's what our goal is with this book is make it easy to read and learn something from it.
[00:04:42] Speaker B: Yeah, good point. I mean, both of us being in the amputee community, when I started reading it was thinking that, you know, it's, it's geared for. For us, those that have lost the limb. But like you say, and I, I picked up early on, this really is relevant for, for anyone that is struggling, going through adversity, looking to. Needing to dig a little deeper. Right?
[00:05:05] Speaker A: Absolutely. Yeah. And that's that I'm top 60. We get that question a lot because it's a, it's a different title, it's a different name. Right. And so we like it when people ask because that's, you know, then we can get into a conversation and hopefully, hopefully help everyone.
[00:05:18] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. And, and I'm certainly, I'm sure, I'm sure it will working backwards. Like I said, motorcycle accident. And I know you were raised on a farm and you've said that even as a really young kid, you just loved horsepower and steel, I think is how you put it. And, you know, anything with an engine. And that's where your love for motorcycles began. And then ironically, I suppose the freedom and independence that you loved about motorcycles is what a motorcycle. Well, a deer really took away from you for a little while and you'd already been tested with tragedy and catastrophe. And we want to talk about that a little bit still. You know, this was kind of like trial three, you might say you essentially saved your own life on the side of the road while waiting for medical help. So share a little bit about that experience and then we're going to talk about kind of digging into resilience a bit.
[00:06:14] Speaker A: So I, I was riding along 4pm, it was still light out and it was a back road of Kingston and there's. It's known to have lots of wildlife around and driving along, not going fast, not breaking the speed limits or anything like I normally would have. And out of a corner of my eye, I see a flash of brown and a deer comes in the ditch, runs into the side of me. I got in a little bit of a speed wobble. I didn't actually go down right away, but once I got control of the bike again, you know, there was a 90 degree turn in the road, of course, and so I tried to make the turn and I'm, and I'm scraping the peg of the bike. I'm turning so hard I'm almost making it. And then the back tire catches the loose gravel and I just felt the bike shoot out from under me. And I remember going down and being like, don't hit your head, don't hit your head. Being a firefighter, I've seen it so many times. You know, the head injuries are the. It's the end. All right. So I tried to ride it out of my butt and I bounced off the road, bounced into the ditch, down into a deep ditch, and I watched my leg, I went in feet first. I watched my leg snap off at the knee and in comes the bike after me, hits the rock and lands on top of me.
And I remember thinking, oh, my gosh, I've done it again. Because I've been in an accident once before. Thought I was going to die in that one. So right away, I go into, you know, fight. I'm gonna. I'm gonna go until I, you know, can't go anymore. And I grab the bike and I flip it off me, and I look down and my legs dislocated at the knee, holding on by some skin. There's blood. I pull my belt out. I tourniquet my leg. I start fishing for my phone. I'm shaking really bad, but I'm like, I gotta get this phone call in. I got a phone and I phoned the fire department. I didn't phone 91 1. I phoned the fire department because I. I know them, and, you know, I knew the girl on the other end of the line and, you know, scream. I'm in the ditch on Northshore Road at the end. If I. If I go unconscious, you know where I am. Come get me. She actually kept me on the phone the entire time, the 17 minutes I was in that ditch until someone showed up. And so while I was down there, a car had driven by. It didn't see me. I was down. I was in a fairly deep ditch.
So I was like, you know, what? If I hadn't just laid there, I might be. I might have been there for days, thinking back.
So I started throwing bike parts that had broke off the bike up on the road. And I took my helmet off and I threw it up on the road. And the next. The next car stopped. Anyways, I was able to stabilize myself enough, get the phone call in. And then I heard sirens. And when I heard the sirens, it kind of gave me that, okay, I might make this. I might. Might not die. And so in that mean, in the meantime, the car that had stopped was a old, little old lady. And she had come to the edge of the road and looked down, and, you know, it was a pretty gory scene. Like, I could. The ball of my ankle was showing. My foot was ripped off. My leg was exposed.
It was a. It was a mess. And I thought she was gonna look at me and be like, nope, and beat it. Right? And meanwhile, she doesn't. She walks down in the ditch, and she puts her arms around me, and she tells me it's gonna be okay.
And I needed that. It's what I needed. At that time, I was alone in the ditch. I was telling dispatch, fire dispatch to tell my family I love them. I'm gonna die. And when she came down and did that, it just changed everything. I felt like I was gonna make it. And I like to tell people, like, just goes to show you, you know, this day and age, people walk over top of someone on the sidewalk laying down and they, they see an accident and they drive as fast as they can the other way. They want nothing to do with it and they just go around it.
But you could be that person that she was for me. So you never know. I, if you have a chance to stop and help someone, always stop, take the couple minutes and stop. You could change the, the outcome for that person. And so I, I like to speak on that quite often because it's such a turning point in that, in that time I spent in that ditch when she stopped. Once the fire department got there, they packaged me up and into the, into the hospital I go. And it was a long ride into the hospital way the sticks, all the way into KGH and Kingston. And when I got to the hospital, I didn't know this at the time, but all of the entire fire dispatch and headquarters chiefs training division, they were all listening in on this call and they were listening in me screaming and telling, you know, telling them I'm not going to make it and say bye to my family and everything. So when I got packaged into the ambulance, they had all driven down to the hospital. And when the ambulance backed up to the hospital, the door is open, it always chokes me up. But there was, there was a tunnel of fire, fire department personnel waiting for me and they wheeled the, the gurney through the tunnel and they all just kind of said their thing. And then at the end, the chief leans over and says, mike, no matter what happens, you'll always have a job at KFR. And. Wow, right? So I was a 36 year old man and thought I had just ruined my entire life. Not, you know, and not the first time that I thought that. But this time I'd really done it and I needed to hear that. And so what, you know, good on him, Sean Armstrong, Chief Sean Armstrong, who, who took, you know, ran down there and really loves his, his people and, and, and did that for me because that kind of gave me that little bit of, you know, drive. I'm like, okay, if, if I've got a spot, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do this right, right from the beginning. Not even knowing the outcome of what happened to me.
[00:11:41] Speaker B: Yeah. What a story of good Samaritan and the brotherhood and sisterhood of firefighters too. Right? All in one so long road of Recovery and rehab, no doubt. And what I found interesting is that you didn't waste any time in looking for the best prosthetic device available. And I think with that focus of returning to your job, returning to firefighting. But I understood from your book that the prosthetic leg represented more than just a mobility device. Let's say for you, if I understood it, it was a renewed sense of purpose and passion for you, right?
[00:12:22] Speaker A: Absolutely.
What, along with my injuries is everyone sees the lag, but I actually broke my neck in two spots and broke my back in three spots. And I had two 12 inch rods in my back as well. And so, you know, that's the stuff that's unseen because of the lag. It's so, so visual. But the lag, I remember sitting there and I kind of knew a lot for three or four days. They reattached the leg for a little bit and it just didn't take. It died. And I remember the doctor came in, he's like, mike, I got bad news and I knew it was coming. And he said, we're going to amputate your leg. And so I actually cried and grieved with my family for about an hour. And then, like you said, I. I was like, okay, I can't change this outcome. It's happening whether I like it or not. And I remember saying to my dad, see that iPad there, dad, grab it, come over here and. And I said, google what the best prosthetic leg in the world is, because that's the one I'm getting. And he's just like, okay, whatever, right? Like, and we googled it and it was the Autobot X3 at the time. And I'm like, that's the one. That's the one I'm going to get. And you know, lo and behold, you know, four months later, I had one. And I've had four of them now, but it was. It's like a new identity, right? I. I wasn't, I wasn't Mike Lachlan, the hockey player. Firefighter. Right. You know, big time, you know, jock, basically. And. And that's how I grew up and always was. But now it's like, you're. You're an amputee. You're Mike Laughlin the amputee, and you have something to prove here. Right? And so when I found out that it never been done before, I went to the chief and was like, listen, we got gotta get this done. I said, I want to come back to the floor. I want to be a firefighter. And he Said, well, it's never been done before. It's kind of a tricky situation. But if you can pass the physical test you did to get onto the fire department when you started, you can keep your job. And I was like, done. So went out and trained my butt off. And the guys at the fire department went out training with me in the training grounds every day and, and I went back and I did that test and I just destroyed it. It actually had a couple times better than two legged people. I, I did a, you know, I, but it was all, it's. I just, I wanted it so bad and so, and it was, it was a new identity for me. I was, I'm Mike Lachlan, the amputee now. And as you know, as you know, when you become, when you're an amputee, it's very noticeable thing and everyone wants to. Has questions and, and so then it became, I want to help people. Right. I want to, I've done this, I've tackled so many obstacles and this is the biggest one. But now, okay, if, if people ask, I want to be able to help them too. So, yeah, I, my identity changed and it was more than just, you know, getting a prosthetic leg. It was like, this is my new, this is power. Right. And I think a lot of amputees use that as their superpower.
[00:15:01] Speaker B: All right. Yeah. And, and you led me nicely to that next question. I want to ask you about that test where you had to run up flights of stairs and pull rope and carry heavy weight. All that stuff that firefighters do in, in the line of duty. And I mean, it was a pass or fail scenario. This was no participation badge waiting for you. Right?
[00:15:21] Speaker A: So, yeah, there, yeah.
[00:15:23] Speaker B: So what's going through your mind? You're confident you, you've done the work, but there was the, that if you failed.
[00:15:31] Speaker A: Yeah, there was nerves. There was definitely nerves, but good nerves because I had, I had trained so hard and I was very confident in my abilities. I knew I, I knew what the test was and I knew what to train for and then just, I wasn't going to go into that test unprepared. And so I knew my, my abilities and I know I, I brought back that, that competitive nature from hockey. So I grew up playing hockey. I, drafted to the Kings of phonics in the OHL, was a captain of the Tier 2 team here, played won a national championship in fastball. So I. Sports was like in me, right. And, and that competitive nature and this, that brought it right out of me again. Right. I Was like, okay, I am not losing. Whatever I have to do, I will do. If I have to do it on one leg, I'll do it, right? So, so there was never any doubt in my mind, to be honest. I just, I just was moving forward as fast as possible.
[00:16:25] Speaker B: You still had to wait for the grade, the, the news that you passed and then you were told you are still a firefighter. What kind of emotion were you filled with then?
[00:16:37] Speaker A: Well, I, my identity, my entire identity was at that point. I'm a firefighter, right? Mike Laughlin, the firefighter. Everyone in small town Kingston, I know half the damn city, right? So I was like, you know, if I fail, I'm kind of a failure. And so when I, when I got that news, it was like, okay, I, I, I could, I've got my life back, we're back on track, and now let's steam forward, right? It's just, it was a lot of emotions because it was a lot of work, a lot of pain. Put my family through a lot of pain, right? Dealing with all the stuff, you know, I, my poor parents, all the stuff I've been through.
And, you know, now that I'm a parent, I understand it.
And so, yeah, it was, it was a big deal and a ton of emotion, but it was all worth it.
[00:17:24] Speaker B: Yeah, I'll bet it was. Right? And that rings loudly through the book too. You know, the book is so much about adversity and resilience like we talked about, and again, working back in time. Jen, your girlfriend who took her own life and, you know, it's unimaginable for, for anyone who hasn't experienced that kind of tragedy. And for you, you were very honest in your book about it and particularly about the spiral of addiction that ensued for you afterward. And you also talk about how you found your way forward through mindfulness and self awareness and, and self care. So a lot to unpack here, but can you share a little bit about how you cultivated resilience in that tragic time of your life?
[00:18:13] Speaker A: It was, it was the lowest part of my life for sure.
Not only did, you know, I feel guilty for what happened, you know, I know you're not supposed to, but at the time, you feel like it was all your fault. You let it happen. You let someone you love, you live with commit suicide.
And so, you know, I had been addicted to painkillers from my first accident in 07, and I fell right off the wagon because I didn't know how to deal with it. And I was masking it just like so Many people do with so many things. With substance abuse, it's a. It's a lot about trauma and not dealing with things properly, right? And. And I. Exception. It was 100% what it was. And I spiraled out of control to the point where I got arrested for buying illegal painkillers. And then, you know, then you think there's rock bottom, and there's always a trap door, and there's, boom, another rock bottom. And it was like, not only am I drug addict, but now I'm a. I'm. I'm a. I'm arrested, right? I'm a. I'm a bad guy in the. In the eyes of the community. And I'm a firefighter, right? I'm supposed to be helping the community. So talk about rock bottom. I just felt like I was useless. But then came kind of an intervention. So my friends and family noticed what was going on and realized, you know, all these things were happening for a reason and confronted me and said, it's time to change your ways. And so I. I was like, 100. I just needed someone to wake me up. And. And so I use that, like you said, and just decided, I'm going to change my life, and I'm going to. And I'm going to, you know, go to the gym and get these little. These little things, do all these little things that lead to success and lead to, you know, getting back on track. And that's what I did. I just started training again, working out, doing all, you know, eating properly, all the little things that keep you, you know, in the right. Let's say in the right lane. And.
And so got back on track. And so that's, you know, that's what led me. I was doing good until 2016. And then. And then the motorcycle accident happened and kind of derailed me for a minute or two. But. But yeah, it was all about, you know, just getting back to the basics. And that's why I tell everybody when I get phone calls, I got two phone calls already today. People that are, you know, struggling, and it's all about, you know, and I offer free help most of the time, and it's like, let's get back to the basics. Drink water and eat a healthy meal, right? And then exercise. If you're. If your mind's going somewhere in the wrong place, exercise, right? Or phone a friend and have a chat. And so all these little things, and I. I had to do that myself. I preach it to everybody, but I have to do it myself. And so I know that's Why I can tell people nowadays, it works, it works. Just getting back to basic, fundamental, you know, living life in a good way. Right?
[00:21:04] Speaker B: Yeah. When you talked about that reintroduction to painkillers. So to be clear, that wasn't because of the motorcycle accident. That was from a snowmobile accident. So now we work a little bit farther back in your life. Your first accident, harrowing experience. You're essentially alone at night on a lake, racing that machine in the darkness, hit an island, and you say to yourself out loud, I'm dead.
You kind of, you know, defaulted to that. But that life or death moment, as I gathered from, from your book, was. It seemed to be sort of the spark for that discovery in you of how deep you could dig within yourself to find strength and resilience and again, this time to save. Save your life.
[00:21:55] Speaker A: Yeah. So until then, until 2007, I. I thought I was invincible. I really did. I didn't, you know, I was just sports player, a hockey player. I was a fighter in hockey and you know, and you know, didn't, didn't lose often. So. And then just in life, I'd never been, I never broke a bone in my life. I never done anything to myself. I thought I was invincible. So I was actually with another guy going across this lake at midnight. It was snowing, it was like a blizzard. It was minus 20 and we're going across the lake. And I kept losing his tail light. I was trying to keep up with him because I didn't know where I was and he knew where he was. And so I'm following, I'm following, trying to keep up this tail light. And I kept losing his tail light and speeding up and oh, there it is, there it is. And about the third or fourth time I lost his tail light. I was speeding up and speeding up and speeding up and I couldn't find him. And so I was, you know, not thinking and trying to catch this guy. And I was doing like, you know, 100 miles an hour across this Lagos on a very fast snowmobile. And I'm, you know, ripping across his lake. Can't see, there's no visibility. And I remember seeing the island about 10ft in front of me and letting go of the handlebars and thinking, I'm dead.
And then I sat up and I was like, oh my God, I'm alive, I'm alive. And I looked down and, you know, my left leg is snapped off at the femur, grossly deformed. And I'm like, oh no, what have I done to myself? Right? And so I. Sitting on this island in the middle of the lake, I had hit the island and flown about 100ft through the island and landed and missed all the trees, luckily, or I'd be dead. And so it's minus 20 in a blizzard in the middle of nowhere, and this guy doesn't know where I am, this guy that I was with. So I'm. I'm like, I'm gonna. I'm gonna freeze to death and diet here. Not only am I broken, I don't know if I'm bleeding death, I don't know what's going on. So I pull my cell phone in my pocket. It was the flip phones in 07. I flip it open 91 1, send. The phone dies. It was so cold. Those old batteries, they just. They just wouldn't hold a charge. I throw the phone. I'm like, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? So I'm like.
And every once in a while, there's a break in the snow, and I could see a cottage on the island that I'd hit. And I was like, okay, what do I have? I kind of took inventory of what I had, and I had a lighter in my pocket, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna light this cottage on fire. The flames will be 100ft in the air. The fire department will come, and they'll find me, and that's the only way I'm going to survive this. So. And you got to understand, like, I could barely move. I. I shattered 6 inches of my femur. So I was dragging myself across the ground and then pulling my leg, dragging myself, pulling my leg, and in extreme pain. You know, when someone. Someone says, you know, are you. Where are you at? 1 out of 10, 10 out of 10 pain. They don't understand what a 10 out of 10 is, right? So I was dragging myself. And eventually, about five minutes after starting my. My trip towards this cottage, I laid down and I just said, that's it. Just die. I can't do this anymore.
I was in that much pain, and I was in that bad of a situation that I was just like, I can't do this anymore. And then things started going through your head, like, I can't do this to my parents. You know, I. I can't do this. I can't give up. You know, they don't deserve this. And so it gave me a little bit of drive to keep going, and I kept going. And about 10 minutes after dragging myself, I laid down for a second time, and I tried to die again. And. And I remember that I was just like, just get it over with. And you close your eyes and I. And then I started thinking again. I'm like, I. I can't give up. I go, my. And it's funny what you think about these times. I'm like, my friends and, you know, co workers and anybody that ever played hockey with me, they're gonna think I'm a wuss. I'm supposed to be this big tough guy, and this tough guy's gonna give up. Well, I'm going to go out fighting. So I started crawling again. And, you know, it gave me the motivation I need to keep going. And then a couple minutes later, I hear this snowmobile coming back. And he had found where I had hit the island. There's. The snowmobile was in the thousand pieces. And he shut the snowmobile off and started yelling back and forth. And then he eventually got to me, got me up on his snowmobile, drove me into. To shore, and then got me in a car and down to the hospital I went. And so I shattered my femur, broke my kneecap off, broke my tibia fibia. And I woke up at a surgery the next day, and I had this huge cast on my leg, right? And I knew that. I knew that was the problem, But I also had a cast on my arm. And I was like, what. What's wrong with my arm? I used. I was using my hands the whole time to drag myself, you know, get in the car. There was nothing wrong with my arm. And the doc's like, oh, yeah, there was. He goes, you had a compound fracture of your ulna sticking out of your skin. I'm like, I didn't even notice because I was in so much pain from my leg, and I was so focused on my femur because I knew that was the problem, that I didn't even notice the arm problem. So I have a plate in my arm that goes about that big. I have a rod for a femur and 33 pins and screws holding everything else together. And. And honestly, I bought. I was back at work eight months later, full duties. And so that was my first real test, like you said. And I was still. I was 26 years old. I was in good shape. And, you know, when they said, do. Do, you know, walk around the, you know, the hospital floor once, I. They'd be like, yeah, okay. And I do, like, 100, right? I was so motivated. I wanted to get out of there, and I want to get back to work. So still young and so, like, I took that, that lesson, especially after my second accident with a motorcycle. I was like, I've done this before, right? I know the blueprint to success. I've done this before and it kind of made the second one, you know, with way more severe injuries than the second one. But I was able to had that experience from the first accident that, that definitely helped me.
[00:27:32] Speaker B: Mike, I hope you don't have to pull that roadmap that blueprint out again. And it's, it's. Hopefully three is you've topped out at that for yourself. Never again, that's for sure. Speaking of family, let's talk about some good stuff. The best part, life Today. You are married with two kids. Angela is your wife, who you met, you might say in the wrong place at the right time.
Tell us a little bit about that. Where you met Angela and, and life is a dad.
[00:28:02] Speaker A: Yeah, so I was in KGH Hospital and after KGH you get sent to St. Mary's Hospital, which is like a recovery hospital where you learn how to be an amputee and how to, you know, basically get back to doing everyday life stuff. So while I was in that hospital, I was, I was bored one day because I was there for, you know, 30 days. And so I had done my physio in the morning and I was out for a little wheel in my wheelchair because I hadn't, I was a long way from getting a lag and so I was about £150, so I was half the man I am now. And I had a neck brace on because my neck was broken and no shirt on and I looked like Joe Dirt in a wheelchair. If anyone knows what Joe Dirt, Joe Dirt is. And so I'm wheeling around and I'm kind of lost. I didn't really know what wing of the hospital I was in because I just been going through doors and saying hi to everybody and, and I was actually looking, you know, everyone knows, you know nurses, they're good looking, a lot of good looking nurses. I was going to look for hot nurses, right. I'm a 36 year old single guy. So I'm going by this one room and I go by and I look in, I will. And I throw the brakes on the chair and I get. And I stop and I'm like, oh my goodness, that is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. And she's leaned over the patient talking to this patient who's in and meanwhile I just, I found her. I was in pallid of care and this patient was unresponsive. Not talking, couldn't hear the nurse, but the nurse was still leaned over her, saying, you know, you look beautiful today. And then. And I'm like, who is this angel who talks to people, right? She doesn't even know what you're saying, and you're still talking to them, treating them like a human. I'm like, it can't be. This can't be real. She's most beautiful woman I've ever seen and an angel. And so I. Sitting at the door, and I get caught sitting there looking at her, and she turns around. So I just made small talk. I went in, made small Talk for about 10 minutes and, you know, got her name and left and made my way back to my room. When I got to my room, I Facebooked her and said, nice to meet you. Looked her up on Facebook. They call that creeping. Creeped her on Facebook, and. And said, nice to meet you. And she later on after her shift had said, nice to meet you. And so time went on, and something was posted on Facebook by her, and I had commented on it, and. And we chatted for a minute, and I was like, yeah, I'm taking my shot. And I asked her on a date, and she said yes. And I figured she just did it to humor me, like, you know, you're a nice guy, but. Right. She had seen me at my worst, and she didn't know what I looked like at this point, but I started to look more like a. Like a. Like a normal person. And. And my. Sorry, My normal self and had a leg and stuff now, right. I was able to walk. And so we went for coffee, went for a walk back to the cars, and I did the worst thing you can possibly do on a date. I looked her in the eyes and I said, I want to marry you and have children.
And she got in her car and left.
And so she completely ghosted me. Two months, ghosted me. Wouldn't answer my texts, wouldn't. Wouldn' have anything to do with me. So I'm like, well, I blew that, right? And didn't think much of it, but I. You know, this. Meanwhile, this girl was waking up in the morning thinking about this guy with this snow leg. And why would he say something like that to me? And maybe there's more to it, and all this stuff's going through her head. So she messages me back about two months later, and we go on a second date. And she said, you know, this time maybe just pump the brakes a little bit, Mike.
And so we go on a second date. And so the the rest is history. We got, we got married in 2018. We have a boy, a five year old boy, Lincoln, in 2020. And so Angela had a daughter when I met her, a six year old daughter who has down syndrome and her name is Kiana. And ironically it's World down syndrome day today, so this is her day. And so she was really worried that, you know, I wouldn't want to take on the baggage of having a daughter with down syndrome. And I was like, are you kidding me? So once you learn about people with down syndrome and they're happy, they light up every room they walk into. It was exactly what I needed in that time of my life. You know, I'm a new amputee, getting back to my new life and, and she, she didn't realize how big of an impact Kiana, right, who wakes up every day happy, had on my life at that time. She's 14 now, she's in high school. And so like I said, World down syndrome days today and she's, and it's her day and we had a big day this morning. It was fun. So, yeah, honestly, that was the, the, all the things that I went through from 07, 2011, 2016, the PTSD, depression, drug addiction, everything in between all led to meeting Angela and now living my best life sitting here in front of you, trying to spread the word, trying to help people.
It all happened for a reason. And, and my, you know, and I just love my family and I love my new life.
[00:32:52] Speaker B: I led that with the wrong place at the right time. Maybe it was the right place at the right time. Hospital romance. You gotta love it, Mike. That's.
[00:33:00] Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely.
[00:33:01] Speaker B: That's great. Listen, before we wrap up, a couple things I want to ask you about something else you do, and that's your, your limb loss fitness program. What's your mission with that?
[00:33:10] Speaker A: Yeah, so being a, you know, Canada's first and only full time amputee firefighter, right. Above knee amputee firefighter, I have all kinds of questions saying, how do you do this, how do you do that? Because obviously being an above knee amputee and even a blow knee amputee, things are different in life and they're hard and so they're, you know, I do pretty much everything I used to do, plus, plus some. And so I get a lot of questions. And so over the years I was, you know, just answering the questions and helping people out. And then I, you know, I started to realize there's a lot of amputees out there that don't know or, or don't know how to get started at getting back in shape and getting back to their life. And so I wanted to offer a place where amputees can go to, you know, get a program, eat properly, you know, count their calories and their macros and have a workout program and have someone to mentor them and, and motivate them, them and do a zoom call once a week and you know, and see how they're doing and how their life is beyond all that, which is how's life? How's, how are things? Are you struggling, what's going on? And so it's all, it's, it's limb loss, fitness and coaching and, and so that's how that became, you know, that's how that became is, is I just wanted to help more people because I realized how many amputees struggle and don't actually get back to their normal life. You know, there's nothing, you know, we are really the exception. There's a lot, there's not as many that get back to where we are say and they, they just can't. They just don't know how. They just, it's a, it's such a shock to their system and to their life, you know, losing a part of them. And people don't know until you in, unless you're an amputee, that, that it's, you know, you know, you've had. For me, I had it for 36 years and now it's gone and I have to learn everything all over again. And, and it was hard and if I didn't have the mindset I did and the discipline I did, I wouldn't have got to where I lot of people just don't have that. They just need that help and a lot of time it's just talking to someone, it's just, oh, you, you do what? And, and you know how to.
[00:35:10] Speaker B: Oh.
[00:35:10] Speaker A: And by the end of a 30 minute conversation, they're on the edge of their chair and I'm like, I'm going to do this tomorrow. And this, it's like, it's so rewarding for me as well. But it's, it's what people need. It's what people need. They just need people, they need an avenue to go to, to get a little bit of help, that little bit of nudge.
[00:35:26] Speaker B: Yeah. It really comes down to peer support.
[00:35:29] Speaker A: Right.
[00:35:29] Speaker B: That by the power of, of hearing it from, from a peer, we can, to hear it from somebody like you who has lived it and, and shares it so enthusiastically.
That's Great. And for folks that are looking for my. For that kind of help. Limbloss fitness dot com. And I'll share that again at the end of the show. One last one for you that really ties into what you were just talking about. Again, back to your book one more time. And in it you say, and I'm quoting, while the impact of trauma on the mind and the body may be profound, it's important to remember that we possess the capacity to overcome adversity and emerge stronger on the other side, end quote. My question, do you believe that that can be true for everyone?
[00:36:20] Speaker A: Yes, 100%.
You know, everything we go through, all the struggles, you know, all the. All the traumas, it all adds up, and it all builds our. Our strength and our toughness, and we are all capable of coming in on the other side. And. And we just talked about it. Some. Some people just need a nudge. They don't realize that they have the capability to do it, and so they just need to be told, hey, yeah, yeah, you do. And, you know, let's do this, let's do this. Let's get you started on the right path.
And then they just. I find they. Once they get started on the right path, it's just. They're gone. And. And all you see is the tail lights. It's like everyone just needs a little bit of a nudge. So, yes, to answer your question, every single person can overcome what they're going through at this moment. Right now, there's no doubt in my mind if I can overcome what I did. And not once, but, you know, many times, let's say six times, maybe, because not the. Only the three big ones, but the three small ones. Ptsd, depression, drug addiction. They're like. Like the little inserts in there. Those are the main ones that people are going through, right? Not the big ones. Everyone's going through these little ones, and. But they're big to them. And so the one of the things I answer all the time is, oh, you know, my. My problems aren't anywhere near what yours are. So I don't want to really talk about it. I'm like, hold on here. My problems are my problems. Yours are yours. Yours are important to you. It doesn't matter how big or how small.
They're important to you. And let's. Let's talk about those. And so, yeah, 100. Everyone's capable of doing it. And if you need help, just reach out. There's. There's people like me all over the place.
[00:38:03] Speaker B: Yeah, that's terrific. And you know, your goal was to be a firefighter, and maybe not everybody's bar is, is that that high? And, and, and I don't mean to sound that is dismissive to any other goals, but what I'm saying is whatever goals people have are their goals and are. They're their gold medals, so to speak. You know where your gold medal was.
[00:38:23] Speaker A: Absolutely. Yep, yep.
[00:38:25] Speaker B: Back to that resilience and perseverance and perspective. I think a lot of it comes down to that too. Right. So, yep. Listen, thank you so much for, for all you do and in your community in Kingston and all you do for the amputee community as well, and for being so, so, so honest and authentic. It. That, that, that's really cool. And I think it's, it's, you know, a good lesson for all of us that we can be honest and vulnerable because that's really led you to where you are today and that there's that resilience if we dig down deep enough. So, Mike, again, I really appreciate your time.
[00:39:04] Speaker A: Thank you very much. I've read the magazine since I became an amputee. I've been, you know, in Marty Robinson's offices here, V2 Innovations, and I enjoy it. And thank you for having this platform. People need it and, and you're making a difference. You really are.
[00:39:21] Speaker B: Appreciate that. Thank you. That's great to hear from somebody who's making a tremendous difference in yourself. So, folks, with that, this has been life and limb. Thanks for listening. If interested in Mike's book, you could order it on his
[email protected] As I mentioned earlier, if you're looking for some fitness help, coaching consultation, a chat with Mike, whatever it may be, limbloss fitness.com and there's lots more about Mike on both of those sites and his keynote. Excuse me, his keynote speaking presentations too. And you can read about others who are thriving with limb loss or limb difference and plenty more at Thrive Mag Ca. And you'll find our previous podcast episodes there too. Until next time, Live well.
